To the guy who cut me off on the freeway,
December 15, 2006 by Jaymar CabebeTo the guy who cut me off on the freeway,
I was changing lanes. You didn’t want me to. Why? I just wanna know why, that’s all. I also want you to learn how to drive. Because, bro, if someone signals, and there’s ample space for a lane change to happen… just let it happen, you know what I’m sayin? Rene and I had to meet up with Francis and Abe for a show, so we were sort of in a hurry. Fans, dude. Legions of fans awaiting the arrival of Touchblue in full Megazord fashion and you almost ruined it. Almost.
A lesser driver probably wouldn’t have gotten past your little blockade. But a lesser driver I am not, douchebag. I made the adjustment, did a little shake ‘n bake, and got right where I needed to be – in front of you. You see, you cannot defeat me. Nope. I am better than you in every way imaginable. Superior. By the way, Rene and I even had a little road-rage retaliation in the works – not because you got under our skin, but mostly because we wanted to teach you a little lesson in freeway etiquette. Like clockwork, the second I passed you, Rene lowered his window and cupped his hand so I could load him up with a little loose change. That’s right, pennies and nickels flung all over your glossy paint. Quarters, silver dollars, manhole covers – oh what a glorious attack it would’ve been…
You’re fast, I’ll give you that. I mean, you may have gotten away, but we won the battle. We pumped our fists in victory as you fled, smiling. I can’t believe you fucking smiled. Fake. A weak attempt at covering up your wounded pride, my friend – weak at best. If anyone should’ve been smiling at that moment, it was me. I was fuming with glee. Go ahead and zoom away in your tinted up Mercedes Benz sedan, with your fake smile. I hate you. With every piston in my minivan’s V6 engine, I loathe you. I will forever have a hatred burning deep in my soul for you and your crappy AMG S55 on dubs, I will destroy you the next time I see you. In a battle to the death, I would smash you because I don’t know if I mentioned this but I am superior to you in all physical and mental aspects I hope you read this and cower in fear every time you drive past a family-sized minivan with side-impact airbags you will even take detours just to avoid the possibility of seeing such a vehicle and it will be terribly inconvenient for you to do so you are an awful human being I hope you are late for work, fuck grammar. Fuck grammar and all the unjustly imposed constraints it puts on my writing… I’m merely trying to express myself in an open and uninhibited fashion because it’s not healthy to keep these kinds of emotions bottled up inside. Dr. Largeman says I should have a proper outlet. Woosahh.
I got the best of you. Dick.
December 18, 2006 at 10:41 am |
awesome, just awesome, jaymar.
December 19, 2006 at 2:22 am |
Lmao, I was laughing my ass off the whole time I was reading this. Why? Because It seemed like something I would have written. This post deserves kudos in all aspect of the word. The way you write shows an elegant viciousness, like a madman’s lullaby. Keep it up.
December 19, 2006 at 3:30 pm |
HA. that piece of crap made you ALMOST miss the show….still funny…good work!
December 22, 2006 at 7:36 pm |
Yay Jaymar’s 1st post. w00t !!!
December 23, 2006 at 11:51 pm |
haha after reading this ill watch out to never cut a family-sized minivan with side-impact airbags lol
December 26, 2006 at 9:33 pm |
yeah, disrespectful drivers suck balls. though you probably shouldn’t have thrown coins at him, you- actually iuno. i’d probably do the same, given the chance o.o
someone cut me off today, too. i cried on the inside. from now on, though, i will remember your burning determination, courage, and valor, then let it fill all of my being and let it manifest itself in a Dhalsim-esque, extended arm punch-in-the-face to that dickhead driver. if this actually occurs, i will then find that asshole that cut you off and Yoga Fire him. unless, in an ironic twist of events, that person turned out to be someone close to you. which is impossible, since you saw him.
rambling’s fun!
December 27, 2006 at 12:07 pm |
wow u kinda made me think that it was my dad who wrote this but i think for a fact that every filippino has fucken road rage when there in the car but man ur so sexy jaymar come to canada PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!do a show here for all the pinoys and pinays that enjoy touchblue, even for the fob filippinos here that act like they’re gangster and shit lol jsut do a show here one time!
well this letter is really a good way to get rid of anger heehe. email me sexy lol!!!!
January 1, 2007 at 9:10 pm |
HAHA!.
The last paragraph’s red text made me lol (literally)
January 2, 2007 at 1:41 am |
lmfao. flippin` ppl off is what i do. stick my head out the window, throw crap, and heck i had the finger for extra. :]
January 2, 2007 at 4:17 pm |
now we never actually threw anything. wanted to, definitely. but never actually did it. that’s why i wrote about it. i thought it might be better to be CONstructive than DEstructive. that’s the lesson of the day, got it? CONstructive, not DEstructive. i am a damn poet.
i would totally take that dude in an octagon, though. =)
January 2, 2007 at 4:17 pm |
and rest assured hazel, we’ll be rockin stages in canadia soon enough…
January 3, 2007 at 11:20 pm |
hahaha you shouldve throwed coins at them. tehy wouldve got pissed.
January 5, 2007 at 8:37 pm |
ah how I miss your road rage. To be safer just throw a thick In n Out milkshake at his windshield. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
January 10, 2007 at 2:37 am |
On January 2, 2007 at 4:17 pm, Jaymar said
Hey Jaymar, I just replied to your post!
January 10, 2007 at 1:53 pm |
On January 10, 2007 at 2:37 am, JR said
now i replied to yours. =P
January 10, 2007 at 8:02 pm |
On January 10, 2007 at 1:53 pm, Rem said
AND I TO BOTH OF YOURS’S!
January 11, 2007 at 1:08 am |
WOW. hahahahahah You always seem to amaze me. Goots job!
January 11, 2007 at 1:19 am |
i don’t know if the first comment went through…
so here i go again.
thanks for such a lovely entertaining blog
now i’m going to sleep w/ a smile
January 11, 2007 at 11:22 pm |
hahaha wow ur my hero!
January 12, 2007 at 8:27 pm |
hahaqhahhahahahahahahahah happy days of the day of celebration of the day of new myears funk people day!!!!!!!!!
heehee
the unknown XD
January 16, 2007 at 2:26 pm |
remember what the doctors said, “whoo sah.” and wouldn’t all that change be better spent on gazillions of rite aid ice cream cones? let’s all hold hands and sing, “lean on me.”
January 25, 2007 at 12:24 am |
minivans are mighty steeds. screw benzs and those money-bathing, bicep-kissing richers. hey jaymar! if yer reading this…say HI! it would make me feel special… ^_^
January 26, 2007 at 1:14 am |
On January 25, 2007 at 12:24 am, micha said
Hi, Micha! Thank you for your support. I agree, they are mighty steeds, indeed. That’s why I always wear my helmet.
Way to support the Touchblue Movement!
January 28, 2007 at 8:09 pm |
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO have a pooooooooooo day yahhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! my nick name is cocohiperlicous ok? goo gaaa waaa oh well peace owt yahhhhh
February 7, 2007 at 8:22 am |
i admire wut u did…although if i were in ur shoes, i’d probably do worse… yep…i have road rage…not proud of it, but i do. =/
PS: u were so descriptive of wut happened that day. i felt like i was in the van with u guys while reading this blog =) oh, & if u would’ve handed me some coins to throw at that a-hole, i’d do it for sure!!! haha! =)
March 9, 2007 at 5:35 am |
SO! WE MEET AGAIN!!? HAHA! IF YOU DIDN’T ALREADY RECOGNIZE.. ‘TIS I! THE DRIVER! BE PREPARED! UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN! AND I’M STILL SMILING! BWAAHAHAHA!
PS… if anyone beleives this… PSYCHE!
March 12, 2007 at 1:49 pm |
On March 9, 2007 at 5:35 am, Ramon said
Ahh, Ramon, is it? Indeed, we do meet again… for the first time… online… which isn’t exactly “meeting” at all…
I suggest you stand down, unless you’d like another savage beating… for the first time… online… which wouldn’t be considered a “beating” at all really…
stoooop it.
February 10, 2008 at 8:41 pm |
Show them to fear the obvious advantages of a family sized with SIDE-impact airbags. You’ve got protection all around.